C o L o R
by Chasing Sunlight
Summary: A wound left alone will fester. It's the same with emotional wounds too. We were left split open with no one there to care for us. No wonder we ended up like this. The only hope we have is in each other.  Team 7 friendship
1. Cherry Red

**warning- this entire fic is based off of self harm and suicidle idealition. If that is not something you can handdle please press the back button. Also, if you are depressed and you find this triggering I would suggest the same action. Otherwise procced!**

A/N: This is a little something a wrote a while back. It's… depressing I guess. Self harm and angst abound Read with care. Song lyrics through out. In this chapter Candles by Hey Monday.

Synesthesia- when your senses become mixed up, so you might hear colors or numbers could have personalities. In this case, people, smells, and feeling have color. It's unrealistic but that's what it's based off of

**Cherry Red**

Sakura stared wistfully at the mirror. Her naked form stared back, hauntingly thin to some, but still a layer of baby-fat, round on her stomach. She could see her ribs starting to poke out, her hip bone jutted out, and her wristed look thin enough to snap. Her eyes washed out to a paler shade. Her cherry red hair thinning and becoming more pastel as time pasted. Everything smelled, felt, tasted of cherry red, it was eating her sense alive, I left only an empty corpse of a girl behind with an unhealthy fixture on a pattern of number the machine underneath her showed. Those number mocked her, dancing colors of grey always accompanied them, various shades, but all telling her that she wasn't good enough.

"98 pounds" she muttered "I look fat enough to be 105" she pinched at nonexistent fat, pulled her skin. Her eyes began to brim with the pain, the shame, the hurt. Sinking to the floor in a heap she put her head between her knees "God, what I'm doing to myself!" she looked up at her reflection. She couldn't take it anymore; she was losing control of everything. She use to be able to control the eating; she use to be able to control her exercise.

She couldn't eat anymore; she could barely make it through a school day.

"I need more control"

_The __power lines__ went out  
And I am all alone  
But I don't really care at all  
Not answering my __phone__  
All the games you played  
The promises you made  
Couldn't finish what you started  
Only darkness still remains_

Sitting in the empty tub Sakura stared as the candle light reflected off her damp skin.

Ever since _He _left everyone had gone down hill. Maybe it was just puberty fucking with them, but no one was left untouched by whatever plagued Kahonas' teenage population. Sakura knew _He_ helped bring it all on. Not that the dark asshole could cause the whole thing, but it seem to be the trigger of the gun of their depression.

"Am I still annoying?"

_Too fat_

_Too ugly_

_Too pink_

_Too loved_

Sakura's candle goes out with a hiss and a plumb of scented smoke. Sighing, Sakura sits up in her tub and grabs a new match. Lighting it against the edge of the box, she carefully held it to the wick

"Ouch" she murmured, dropping the burnt out match stick on the porcelain tile. She stared blankly at the box full of more sticks. She took out one more ant lit it. She held it to her left wrist carefully.

**Burnburnburn**

Peeling away at the layers of flesh

Blacking the bone

Burning away all the **fatfatfat**

The cherry red light burned so softly

It stung

And severed he nerves

But she was in control

A small smile pulled at her red lips, the same color as the soft flickering light of the candle distorting her pretty features, marring it with an ugly image of what was inside. What she had to keep inside.

She blows the candles out. Looks like a solo tonight.

The early January air bit sharply at her exposed skin, but the winter weather made long sleeves a necessity. Something of a relief, because it covered the evidence of her newly acquired control; which had become something of a habit.

Sliding in among the faceless crowd of empty minded students Sakura makes her was to homeroom just as the bell rings. It doesn't matter if she's late because the sky will become red and gravity will fail before her teacher is ever there 10 after the bell rings.

As she trudged into homeroom she was hit by 2 things, only one person sat on the left side of the room. And that person was _Him_, sitting in the back with his black bangs covering his eyes, head pressed against the window. Her stomach clutched at the familiar aura he gave off.

'_Hate__**Confusion**__Hate__**Akwardness**__Hate__**Worry**__Hate__**Depression**__Hate__**Disragarded**__Hate'_

Midnight blue and formidable black

_Been black and blue before  
There's no need to explain  
I am not the jaded kind  
Playback's such a waste  
You're invisible  
Invisible to me  
My wish is coming true  
Erase the memory of your face_

Sitting down in the front of Sasukes' row, Sakura was soon joined by a comforting sunshine yellow presence in her mind.

"_Smile__**Wanting**__Smile__**Caring**__Smile__**Hurt**__Smile__**Depression**__Smile__**Needy**__Smile_"

"Hey Sakura-chan!" Naruto proclaimed giving her a toothy grin "Don't you hate the weather? All this cold, grey-ness gets to a guy"

"Yeah, and it means midterms soon" Sakura said looking over at the bright boy. Squinting at him, there was something… out of place with him. She just had this feeling. Something seemed less bright about him.

"Your eyes" she says "They're different…" what use to be sparkling summer blue had changed to ocean blue when _He_ left. Now they where undeniably navy

"Really? I didn't notice" He said giving her a smile and a wave of blinding white in his pattern; he was lying to her

"It's prolly just the lights" She says turning a way, still worried about the boy. She could tell he was struggling just as she was, if not worse. With the new addition of _Him_ it could all become too much. She immersed herself in her thoughts about what could become of this new issue. All the colors of her world over whelmed her thoughts, the smell of Moonstone and Cobalt, the feel of everyone's auras, the light acrid taste of teal. The balckness of her closed eyes muted all of it, leaving her in a quieted world.

"Naruto" tensing and opening jade eyes, the cherry-headed girl turned to the midnight boy. Her sense narrowed down on the two clashing personalties, so concentrated she could barely _see_ anymore colors

_Lost sight  
Couldn't see  
When it was you and me_

"Uchiha" Naruto said, turning to face his old friend, rival, and brother. Tacking a smile on, they looked almost the same, but their interactions had changed along with their bodies. Naruto; liquid sunshine hair, caramel skin, and deep blue eyes. Sasuke; a mass of dark hair and eyes, both with blue tints, mixed with marble skin and stone features. "Hn" his eyes flick slightly to the left "You've changed" He wouldn't even look directly at his eyes, couldn't look at the misery he'd caused. He could even **talk** to her, because she was too _fatfatfat._

"You haven't" The blond replied, turning back to stare at the board, avoiding those vortexes that sucked the color out of everything; his eyes. They had always been Sakuras' favorite feature on her dark team mate. They where dangerous, but she loved a bit of peril. Maybe she was just a bit of masochist.

"Narto…" he trailed off. Was he hesitating? That dusty pink aura wasn't normal and it wasn't in an Uchiha behavior to hesitate "I'm" he paused again, eyes shifting to the left again. He's nervous, she realized "I'mSorry" he murmured, eyes switching quickly over to Sakura, only a second thought to the dark boy "Both of you" He quickly strode back to his widow seat. Giving off brighter traces of rose pink. Now he's embarrassed?

Sakura finds this whole thing utterly confusing, thank you. That was not an Uchiha thing to do, who had taken Sauske, and drained him of all his former rules, pride, and duty to his clan? Even if he really meant it… she couldn't forgive him now.

_One day  
You will wake up  
With nothing but "__**you're sorrys**__"  
And someday  
You will get back  
Everything you gave me_

Sunny: Sooooooo, what's the ruling? Yay or nah? Silent readers are okay but review and such to make my day. :)

See you soon ya'll, have a good one.


	2. Sunset Orange

A/N: Second chapter in Naruto's POV. Songs are Dead Skin by Crossfade and the very last quote is 20 Dollar Nose Bleed by Fall Out Boy.

Waring: selfharm, read with caution.

Sunset Orange

_So I'm the king of all these things of this mess I have made  
Such a waste what a shame my whole life is a fake_

Naruto didn't know what to do anymore. Everything was just headed down the shitter. It had been that way his whole damn life, it was starting to get to him. It had all piled up and he would be screwed if things keep on in this direction. He didn't think he could deal with anymore of his hopes being crushed. He didn't think he could deal with anymore of his 'friends' deserting him. He was tired of the knots in his chest as he heard people talk about him on the street. The cruel words they throw at him, the searing glares. He was tired of being hated, and shunned, and beat on.

He was tired of everything

But his demons still chased him

Chased him into the dark

All that connected him to the light

A burnt orange thread

But he couldn't show it, the old and new wounds

He stayed that ray-of-fucking-sunshine everyone was a custom too. Sunset Orange; bright, cherry, beautifully distracting, but with a hint that something was coming to end, that end came fast then you expected.

Much

Much

Much faster

_Well I'm a bore and I'm sure I'm a thorn inside of you that has torn at you for years_

Everyone who could get past his plastic, blinding smiles where headed down hill too. He knew that Sasuke had been affected by it (**for the while he had cared**). That the Teme had picked up on his feelings the closer they got to each other, he had even go to the point of getting everything out of him in return for spilling everything about himself. Apparently he had left something out, because when Naruto went after him to drag his ass back he had reviled something to him.

-He was just a pain, to be used and thrown aside when the person was done. He had no purpose, reason, or point to live. He caused more trouble then he was worth-

He didn't see why people even tried to protect him if they where just going to leave him.

That's what got him the most, the fake hopes

Sasuke had lead him on

He knew anyone else would

They all did

They all broke his trust, his hope that things might turn around for _once_ in his god-damn life; a simple _'sorry'_ couldn't fix that

He was much too tired of it

The constant worry that he would be alone again

He was sure that would be the end of him

_**No more trust**_

_The alcohol the demerol these things never could replace  
What a minute with you could do to put a smile on my face  
I'm a bore and I'm sure I'm a thorn inside of you that has torn at me for years  
I can't get out of this dead skin I_

_Can't shed my skin  
I'm not sure where to begin _

_Why can't I begin again_

Naruto was walking home; he (**for once**) left on time, without detention. It was brisk and there was no wind but the cold lay down on the city and wouldn't get up, it was February. Pulling his thread-bear, oversized orange jacket closer to his skinny frame, he trudged on. Passing through the outskirts of down, down by the lake, still frozen over.

As he past the dock, he stopped in his tracks.

A black dot sat at the edge of the dock, hair reflecting a weird blue

His mind replayed the situation, only now, he was 5 and so was the raven on the dock.

When had they gone back to that?

Back to hating and fighting and desperation and loneliness

It was all coming back

All the old wounds reopened

All the old nastiness

Only now

They understood why

They where

Doomed

To be

Miserable

Sasuke looked up

Naruto turned his nose up

And walked away

_-ranaway-_

From the pain, the memories

But his demons still chased him

Chased him into the dark

And the light was too far now

Too far to pull on his life line

Alone again

Inside his apartment

Shared by the never present Ikura

And it wasn't his fault entirely

That he doesn't notice

Missing alcohol

Blood rusted knifes

And the isolation

And again

Like so many nights before

Naruto downs a glass

And lets it take affect

Before taking out one

Of his favorite kitchen knifes

And draws it across his wrist lightly

And the blood trickle sluggishly

Another affect of the alcohol

Ramming through his system

And he removes his jeans

And lets loss a barge of

Nicks

Scrapes

Slices

And deep wounds

On already patchworked skin

Marring caramel to reveal the apple underneath

The juicy, dripping, red, apple

And addiction worse then ramen

And much more permanent

_It's not me, it's you  
Actually, it's the taxidermy of you and me  
Untie the balloons from around my neck and ground me  
I'm just a racehorse on the track  
Send me back to the glue factory  
Always thought I'd float away  
And never come back_

* * *

Sunny: Well there you go. Second bit. It's a 6 part series btws. The six colors of the rainbow, each from the prespective of either Naruto, Sakura, or Sasuke.

Yus, give me review love and you're sure to get a new chapter sooner :)

Stay execllent


	3. Sunglow Yellow

A/N: Normal Warning applies. Self harm, depression, ect. Lyrics are from Bring Me To Life by Evanessence. Naruto's POV again. Enjoy my darlings~

Sunglow Yellow

_Wake me up inside  
-Save me  
call my name and save me from the dark  
-Wake me up  
bid my blood to run  
-I can't wake up  
before I come undone  
-Save me  
save me from the nothing I've become_

* * *

It was almost the end of March when Naruto sat in his seat at the old table in the cafeteria, vandalized by years of students gone by. Sakura looked up at him and smiled a little before going back to poking at her food while Ino chattered in her ear while somehow managing to vacuum her lunch in a matter of minutes. Shikamaru sat on Inos' right sleeping on his text books while Sai sat next to him and went though his normal routine of insulting the blonds manhood.

_A normal day_

_A __**boring**__ day_

Sai excused himself early with the pretense of talking to the art teacher; they all knew it was more screaming then anything. His teacher did not understand his eccentrism; which is saying something considering the teacher was strange enough by himself. Ino had excused herself to the ladies room.

Sakura turned to him then, with Shikamaru incapacitated by his laziness

"Can I talk with you after school?" The pinkette asked apprehensive, as if she expected him to say no, or worse. But he could do no such thing, he himself was too guarded to ask for help

"Sure thing" Naruto plastered a happy mask on "What about?"

"That smile for one thing" Sakura said getting up from the table "Uchiha for another" she went and dumped her uneaten lunch in the trash can, and when she came back to grab her bag she quietly said "maybe even my eating habits " and she shoved off into the thickening crowded of teens as the bell signaled the end of lunch

And the end of another boring, lonely day

The walked down from school, turning into the path to Itkurias, the old ramen house.

"So…" Sakura paused; unsure, weary, scared "I-erm, I mean to say…" she paused again. The poor ghost of a girl didn't know where to begin, so he took a blunt approach

"You're anorexic" Naruto said for her nodding his head slightly in acknowledgement "It's become slightly obvious, though you hide it pretty well with your baggy clothes" They stepped into the ramen bar and took their seats, the same ones they used to occupy years ago. A happier, more care-free times. So much had changed in only a few years, it was slightly disconcerting to have all those old memoires dragged to the surface. It did help to make the old pair more comfortable

"Yeah… I'm surprised my mother hasn't noticed yet" Sakura replied, finding the topic easier to talk about with her not having to actually say the dreaded words "But she's been busy with the divorce papers…"

"How is that?" the blond asked, intrigued, as this topic was one Sakura normally avoided. Along with her dietary issues. He realized Sakura never really talked of anything of real importance, just school and gossip.

"As well as can be expected, my mother sued for all the money and full custody... she won the case" She made a face; though Sakura did not get along well with her mother, her father had been a bad alcoholic for years. Her old man just took it too far one day.

"I guess that was kinda predictable, what with him going to jail. The court must have had trouble seeing him as anything but a criminal" Naruto said, the ending becoming bitter. Sakura chewed at her lip at his old statement about mistreatment. He knew she was thinking about how the people of Kahona treated him. How they shunned, berated, and detested him. It had never been his fault, but that had never mattered to the people.

"How are things with you and Ikura?" Sakura asks as two bowls or miso ramen arrive. Naruto dived quickly into his bowl, finishing quickly and replying

"He's not around much anymore; he spends a lot of time with Kakashi, work keeping him busy" He couldn't look at her while saying it

"Yeah, so you're all alone in that house?"

"Pretty much"

"Oh" her eyes said more '_that explains some things'_

* * *

_How can you see into my eyes like open doors  
Leading you down into my core  
Where I've become so numb without a soul my spirit sleeping somewhere cold  
Until you find it there and lead it back home_

* * *

The headed back to Narutos' house, but on the way there they stopped at the old bridge, the river running swift and cold with ice melt that was created by the weak march sun

"Hey, Naruto?" Sakura said sitting with her back against the railing

"Mmhm" the blond reciprocated sliding down next to her

"Have you ever thought about hurting yourself?" The Pinkette held her breath, waiting to see the reaction to her bold question

"A few time… you?"

"Not until recently" Sakura huddled up, her thin body offering no resistance to the still bitter cold, she should have worn a jacket. He saw this and gave her his hoodie. She thanked him and quickly pulled it over her head.

"Have you ever?"

"Hurt myself?

"Yeah"

"Have you?"

"Yes"

"Me too" He saw the intense burst of realization of what weight those simple words carried in her washed out eyes, her lids closed, and then opened. She smiled, chapped lips pulling taut, the sun hitting her face. He could see what she was, wanted, and hoped in those few second of vulnerability. It scared him, it scared him shitless. He never though Sakura was capable of so much insight or hurt, and it scared him, because he had never seen it before when it was right there in the pair of jade stones the burned bright, whether from the weak sunlight or from some hidden passion he wouldn't know. It scared him that even with how shitty his life was, Sakura's was almost equal.

Sakura exited his house, holding the yellow hoodie she was barrowing from him close to her matchstick body. She smiled and thanked him for spending the afternoon with her, and he laughed it off. Scratching the back of his head, he told her he wouldn't have done any homework anyways, and that she could bother him any time.

"We're both hella messed up aren't we?" It's a statement, no room for augment. This time he couldn't mistake the fire in her eyes for the sun, because it was setting behide the house. He doesn't know what to say to that. "But we have each other now" Sakura said giving him a swift but powerful hug, it amazes him she had that much power in so little and weak a girl "And we both can't leave each other, so there's no going back now"

"Yeah…" He wasn't sure he could do it again, trust; it wasn't easy. But her eyes promised so many things, in such an honest, unguarded manner, he'd be hard put to deny her promises of loyalty.

"Believe it Uzumaki" and with a wink she was gone, and all that was left was the sunglow of the falling sunset.

_Maybe the sunset came faster_

_But_

_There would always be a sunrise_

* * *

A/N: Yus, here it is. Hope you liked it :)

Next one posted in 1-2 weeks

Stay Exellent!


	4. Jade Green

A/N: I'd just like to say, reviews are what makes it worth it :)

Jade Green

_I tremble__  
They're gonna eat me alive  
If I stumble  
They're gonna eat me alive_

* * *

The showers of April were held back by the constantly blowing wind and Sakura had to take extra care not to freeze her tiny butt of in the wind. She sped walked her self up the winding path to the training grounds. She and Naruto were meeting there because Ikura was home today and they didn't want the man interfering with their bonding sessions.

She hugged he thick bamboo green sweater closer as the lime wisps of winds blew past her in another strong gust. She was overcome by the sweet cedar and copper smell of the trees the blocked the wind from the training grounds. She and Naruto always picked places brimming with memories to talk. It was easier for them to open up when they could remember what it was like to trust another person. It had been only two years ago, but it felt like a melanin to Sakura, she was such a different person now, for better or worse.

"Sakuraaaaaaaaaaa" Naruto wailed coming up the path and encasing her in one of his bear hugs, she giggled and returned the favor with her own bone crushing hug

"So what is the theme for today?" She asked settling herself cross-legged on the ring of grass that was training.

"I think we'll continue on with our Parents and Guardians today since we didn't finish yesterday" The blond said lying down with his head in her lap "You first" he offered playing with the stubs of turtle-shell grass

* * *

_Help, I'm alive, my heart keeps beating like a hammer  
Hard to be soft, tough to be tender_

_Come take my pulse, the pace is on a runaway train_

* * *

Sakura walked down the halls, her head down. She had gone to visit her father in custody last night. Things hadn't gone so well, and know she was sporting a split lip. She was so intent on not looking up that she ran into someone. Someone who oozed Midnight and Arctic Grey

'_Shit_'

"Excuses me Uchiha-kun" She said still not looking up, something was wrong though. He didn't move out of her way, he didn't make some scathing remark, he just continued to stand there. She chanced looking up, and for a moment she saw something painfully complicated

Uchiha Sauske was standing in front of her in a rumpled uniform, both sleeves rolled up, eyes glazed over. On his left sleeve she felt something dark and rich that smelled of rust and apples.

"Sasuke?" Sakura reached for his sleeve. Snapping into current times, Sasuke stepped to the side

"Hn" he swiftly brushed past her

'_Was he…?'_

She had to tell Naruto.

Sakura watch him carefully now, even if Naruto said it was nothing and that they shouldn't care. She still watched him with a hawk's eye.

Every couple of days he would come to school looking dazed and smelling something she had distinguished as blood.

His parents we're dead, so he wasn't being abused

Everyone worshiped the ground he walked on, so he wasn't getting beaten up

That really only left one option unless he had loss his Uchiha elegance and had a habit of tripping and falling on sharp objects. This seemed highly unlikely.

She chewed her lip, wincing as she bit her split lip.

Pain

Such a funny thing

The reason for pain

Was to teach you

To avoid

Danger

So

Did enjoying

Pain

Mean you

Couldn't sense

Danger?

That would be troublesome

Maybe it

Just meant

She was

Danger

She almost laughed at this. Her? Dangerous? Small, pink, she could barely make it through the day with out passing out.

The she thought about

Really

Thought about

It

She was killing herself.

Slowly

Painfully

She wasn't quite sane was she?

She did laugh at this

Naruto stared at her from across the lunch table. He raised an eyebrow

"Do you think I'm dangerous Naruto?" Sakura asked resting her head on her hand

"Is that a trick question?" the blond asked looking on edge. A strong hot, boiling red falling off him. Fear. Fear of being abandoned, used, unloved.

"No Uzumaki, I just want your opinion"

"Hmm" he stared at her a few second; hand on chin, fingers scratching at his head. It was almost comical "Yea, yea you are"

* * *

_I have listened, and I have watched  
I've gave into this for long enough  
I have lost, and I have loved  
Sleep has stolen far too much  
So don't close your eyes, not just yet_

_Sleep is just a cousin of death_

Sakura lay in bed, engulfed by masses of green bedding. It was afternoon if the light from her window was any indicator. The rays of white light poked her none to gently. She rose with a moan. Lightheaded, lightheaded, lightheaded.

Better. She walked to the window. Leaves danced in the wind, a wild animalistic action. Flailing and shudders. Crackling clouds hung high and dry in the sky. Thunderstorm to come. She could smell it. Hear the aqua and muddy green of the rain taptaptaping. Something was coming, not just the storm.

Checking the time, Sakura discovered she had 4 hours until she had to meet Naruto. She divested herself of her pj's and stood in front of her mirror. She tried to look past the flaws. Tried to see love where she saw fat, tied to see skin pulled taught over bone instead of rolls of flesh. She still couldn't see it. She brushed at the wispy hairs that had grown all over. One of the draw backs, your body grew hair in a vain attempt to waste less energy in keeping her body temperature up. Sakura had wanted to be a doctor. She had read what her health text book had on eating disorders. It wasn't pretty. Then why, why had she though it might hold answers. To be pretty to be thin, where had any of it gotten her. She could barely function, she hadn't gone to the bathroom in weeks, she hadn't had her period in months, all she did was work out, sleep so she wouldn't eat and so she could go to school. She stepped up on the scale.

"88"

She most likely looked just as hallow and empty as she felt now

But there was still that bulge

That bulge on her tummy

That bit of love that never left

Naruto

'_I want there to be more to love Sakura-chan!'_

'_I feel bad hugging you cuz I think I'm gonna break you in half!'_

'_The weight might go to your boobs. Think about it! You could totally get any guys in school with a nice rack'_

She had hit him for that one, only Naruto could turn this into a joke. She loved him for it though. Love and laughs, that's what was going to get them through this.

* * *

_I can promise you one thing: death will take us all  
I can promise you one thing: you will die alone_

We're all going to Hell, we may as well go out in style  
Death is a promise, and your life is a fucking lie

* * *

On top of the roof the air is so cool and so calm. Everything is a swirl of colors, smells, sensations, feelings as the sunrises. Sakura wakes up slowly, stretching to relieve tense muscles from sleeping in an unfavorable manner. He rustling movements awaken the bleary blonde on her right. He blinks as he sits up, a flash of confusion the realization on his face. Then he laughs, falls back on the slanted slope and sticks his hands behind his head.

"Can't believe we fell asleep on the roof" he grinned goofily "Ikura's gonna kill me"

"Just tell him it was an emergency, for my mental stability" The pink haired girl suggested "wouldn't be far from the truth" she muttered as an after thought

"Even with the shitty sleep I got I actually feel kinda good" Naruto mussed "Prolly cuz I got you to eat a bowl of ice cream" he said with one of his million watt smile. Only this one reached his eyes, if only for a moment.

"Maybe it has something to do with the fact that you didn't poison your liver last night" Sakura said in a huffy manner

"Bah, technicalities" he said waving his hand in a dismissive manner. The pair laid there in a mostly comfortable silence as they watched the sun come up over Hokage Mountain.

Then Naruto's stomach growled, a sprawling of neon green spiraled in Sakura's minds eye. She laughed

"Heh, I'm hunger, got any ramen" he asked hopeful. Sakura simply hit him over the head "Owwie, Sakura-chaaaaan, what was that foooor" He whined as the pinkette clambered back into her room through the window.

"I need to make sure you don't die of a sodium overdoes as well as alcohol poisoning. Jeeze"

"Mah, I can eat what I want" the blond said with a pout, puffing out his cheeks like the child he never got to be

"Shut up, we're having pancakes"

* * *

_I refuse! I refuse!  
I refuse to close my eyes_

* * *

A/N: YAY, more then half way through. Only 2 more to go. I'm having trouble with the ending though. I can't decided wether or not to leave it all tied up or with some loose ends. Any suggetions?

I also don't know what to do when I'm done with this story. Finish my other story of course, since I promised myself... but that's almost done as well.

See ya'll later. Stay excellent!


	5. Midnight Blue

A/N: This is actually the first chapter I wrote for this serise. Why? Because it's super easy for me to write from Sasuke's POV, it was my insperation for the whole color idea. As an art student colors have always meant a lot more to me then is normal.

I finally found a way to make line breaks that don't disapear when I upload to ff. This makes me happy, and it will also most likely make you happy too since you can tell where I actually wanted them to be.

**Midnight Blue**

The color of the things he hated

The color of his family

The color of the night

The color of the lake

The color of his eyes

The color of the things he loved

His pocket knife

His wristband

His mind

His dreams

Sasuke sat on the dock; it was a calm spring evening. A little too cold to be outside, but he didn't want to stay in. Staring blankly at the rippling surface of the lake had become an increasingly morbid obsession. It had been years since he had almost drowned himself in the same spot jumping after his own disturbed image of himself. He'd almost made that a reality; he almost became Itachi. That would never happen again; he couldn't become that, so he came back.

But returning to Kahona was a mistake. Everything was full of midnight shadows and unsaid regrets. Naruto avoided him, and just plastered on a fake smile and made excuses when he corned him. Sakura wouldn't even look at him; she was quite and didn't care for anyone, even boys, accept for Naruto and occasionally Sai when he wasn't insulting her.

The only two people Sasuke had grudgingly learned to love were gone a replaced with shadows of their former selves.

And it was entirely his fault

Sasuke gripped the edge of the dock, feeling more then a few splinters work their way into his palms. He closed his eyes, he can feel everything trying to battle its way outside.

God, how much he wishes he could just drown himself

But he's an Uchiha (_whatever that matters anymore_). He has to be strong, has to keep leaving as an empty shell. It's only one more year and he'll graduate, leave for college, meet some girl, take her back home, settle down, pop out some kids, _then_ he can die.

'_You know that's not going to work anymore, it hasn't worked since you returned.'_

-o-

He can still hear his father and mother arguing

He could feel Itachi in a drug induced panic

Could taste the hate, and blood, and acid air

It had been 12 years

And he still couldn't shake the feelings

_Tell me when I'm gonna live again  
Tell me when this fear will end  
Tell me when I'm gonna feel inside  
Tell me when I'll feel alive_

_Steelsteelsteel_

Cold, emotionless, sadistic

What he wants to be

But the _Bloodbloodblood_

It makes him

Warm, caring, masochistic

The scares are hidden

It makes him

Everything, nothing, a pacifist

And it hurts-so-good, don'tmakeit goaway, Ineedit, Icraveit

The bumps and ridges of healed flesh washed away by more_ redredred_

When heaven and hell come together and purgatory is smashed in between

Sasuke quickly licks the blood off his arm, the metallic tang burns his senses even more. He continues to stare vacantly out the window from his bed, forehead pressed against the frigid glass. His arm hanging loosely off the right, dripdripdriping on the black of his bedding creating indisguisable signs

-o-

Class the next day was as nondescript as the last. He sits, stares at the board, answers questions when called on. During brunch he sits in class and does his homework, then repeats his class time routine. Then during lunch he finishes his homework.

But not today

Sasuke sits on the chair farthest in the back and closest to the window. He stares off into the rain splattered glass pains. He's going to be soaked if he goes out to the dock.

He doesn't notice Sakura and Naruto until Sakura taps him on the head.

"Sasuke-kun" the surname added because of habit, not for affection

"Hannro, Uzumaki"

"Uchiha, we need to talk" Naruto said shedding his normal plaster face, his eyes darkening to a deeper blue; one he was too familiar with.

"Why now?"

"Because you always disappear right after school, and we can never find you" Sakura explained

"No, I mean, why now? Why not when I tried to talk to you before" Sasuke glared at the pair "Why not before when I need…" screwing his eyes shut, he stopped mid ramble. Why couldn't he act like an Uchiha anymore?

"Sasuke-kun…" Sakura said quietly, reaching out to comfort him. Sasuke slapped her hand away, but Naruto grabbed his arm

"Damnit Teme, we're trying to help you here!" The blond yelled in rage. Sasuke looked up to see Naruto looking at him with those eyes. The navy was much too close to midnight; he looked at Naruto's grip on his arm instead. What he saw shocked him.

Scares littering the tan wrist

"I'm the one that needs help dobe?" Came the ravens icy reply as he ripped his arm away from the stunned pair "Help yourselves before you help others" He push out of his seat "You're more important anyways" he muttered as he walked out

-o-

Sasuke's drenched bangs hang limply in his face; the fridge rain had soaked him two hours ago when he had ditched the rest of school.

He couldn't feel the delayed May rain; he was too numb from the combination of low temperature and losing himself to his thoughts.

Why now? Damn, he wasn't sure if he should except the help or let them carry on their not-so-marry lives and hopefully heal.

Now that he thought of it, he was sure he saw Sakura wearing a wrist band a couple weeks ago. When she wasn't wearing her long sleeved shirts.

God, they all needed help.

"Teme, you idiot what are you doing sitting in the rain"

'_Naruto?'_

He was turned around forcibly to meet a smattering of sunshine in the dreary grey weather

"Are you insane? How long have you been sitting here?"

"Since lunch" the blond scowled at his response

"Go home Teme" said the blond wearily "Get yourself indoors, so I can too"

"Hn" came Sasukes' simple reply.

"Idoit, are you trying to kill yourself?"

"That was a stupid question, even for you dobe" The raven replied standing to face his ex-bestfriend, staring down into his eyes "Your eyes are that color again" he says, throwing Naruto off balance with his out-of-the-blue question. Sasuke quickly sized the moment to leave.

Heading to his house

That house was not a home anymore

Home is where the heart is

He was just fucked then

-o-

The night always found him alone, the dark whispering old feelings, thoughts, and memories back into his mind. He was drowning, not in they way he hoped for, but he was drowning none the less. It was just his luck that he got what he wanted in a way that came back to smite him in the ass. He wanted to be like Itachi, he wanted power, he wanted to return, he wanted help, and then he wanted to drown. Funny, how life seemed to be a series of disappointments only broken by periods of crushed hope and dark spells of depression.

Sasuke broke from his revelry as he phone vibrated.

Sasuke picked up the gadget, the screen shone **-Sakura-** right back at him in the washout shadows of night.

"Hn" he asked, keeping his voice flat. He was feed up with this; all he wanted was to release, cutcutcut it deep, then go to bed.

"I know what you're going to do, so stop" Her voice was direct, and held a bit of underlying worries

Sasuke didn't know what to say to that. Well, she was his old stalker, it wasn't that surprising she new how he worked after all that time.

"I know, and I know you know that it's bad. I know your cutting and hurting, and we've done nothing to help the situation so far. But you have to realize we're going through things too, and you too abandoned us in out time of need. It was shitty of us not to help your even though. I just want you to know, me and Naruto forgive you now. Not matter how selfish we've been; at least we're here now. We have won your trust before and we can win it back"

A large pause only filled with breathing and phone static

"It's too late anyways"

Sasuke hung up, put his phone down, and took the razor off his bedside table. Just as he put the metal to his puckered skin his phone vibrates again.

Growling Sasuke picks it up and reads the txt before chucking the phone at the wall, his razor following with a hallow clatter in the empty mansions halls.

The cracked screen still shown with Sakura message.

'_**It's not too late, it's never too late'**_

**-o-**

A/N: I've been sick all week D: So while sitting at home today I remembered that it's been like, a week since I last posted. YAY for almost timely.

One more to go. I'm finishing it up as we speak. The ending is still a little sketchy. But it's also super long. Like, twice as long as most of the other chapters.

Anywho, I hope you enjoyed and that you may grace me with a lovley review :)

Stay excellent folks!


	6. Vivid Violet

A/N: This is the first story I have ever finished. Mad props to me!

I hope you enjoy the final instalment of Colors! Happy reading~

* * *

Vivid Violet

_A hundred days have made me older  
Since the last time that I saw your pretty face  
A thousand lies have made me colder  
And I don't think I can look at this the same_

They say suicide is a selfish act. That those who commit it just want the attention, that it's more about how many people will come to the funeral then that they simply can't take it anymore.

This may have some truth to it, but Uchiha Sasuke was an exception.

He was always the exception.

So as he stood at the edge of the dock, he thought not of how Sakura would shatter as she cried the last of the energy out of herself, or Naruto and his hallow eyes and a broken smile, intoxicated and smashed out of his mind.

All he though of was the end. The nothing he wanted more then the everything. Maybe that made him even more selfish, not thinking how other would react. He really didn't give a shit at this point. Not what they though, not what he though. He was done. So incredibly finished. He was the opposite of a ghost; his body remained but his sprit was gone. All that need to be done was dispose of the shell.

What waited beyond he didn't know, nor did he care. Even hell must be better then this. He could live a new live with reincarnation. Laying dead at the bottom of the lake, stone cold and alone, even that sounded greater then the existence he had been carrying out.

The water churned violently, boiling to the surface in angry bubbles and pockets of spitting foam. It called hungrily for him, clawing at his ankles. The thump of wind and rain on his back pushed the dark haired boy closer, leaning over the edge. He saw things in the pockmarked surface. Distorted and twisted in both his mind and the water below. His brother, Naruto, Sakura, Kakashi, Orochimaru, his parents, blood, death, destruction, pain, suffering, agony, but worst of all he saw himself.

And dear God, that was the last of it

The edge is a dangerous place

You can either step back or forward

But stay in the same place

And the razor tip will make the decision for you

Slowly slice its way through

Skin

Thoughts

Feelings

Sanity

And hurt and hurt

Do you like to hurt?

_I do, I do_

But one day

The wind will blow it away

And tumble

Down

Down

Down

**Splash**

-o-

The first thing he noticed was the smell. Bleach and iodine. Starched Linen.

The second thing he noticed was the sounds. The steady Beep Beep Beep. A soft snoring. Mumbling words.

The third thing he noticed was the feeling. A sledgehammer to his chest. A light dip near his feet. Something at the elbow.

The forth thing he noticed was the sight. Hospital. Sakura. Naruto.

The last thing he noticed was the thoughts.

_I'm alive…_

_Shit _

-o-

Uchiha's don't handle failure well, mostly because it is not something they are accustomed to. Sasuke, always the exception, should have been ready for it. After all he had failed at everything most of his life. But no, only he could have failed even at ending his own life. Something so fragile, yet he was so thoroughly incompetent that he had botched that as well. Figures. He would have hung himself, he should have hung himself. Quick and clean, though it left no room for people to question how or why he had died. He didn't want the suicide label. But fucking Christ, he was desperate now. Dead was dead when all was said and done.

"You awake?" Naruto asked from the chair at the foot of the bed. He had been asleep with his head on the bed; it appears he had awakened during the ravens inner crisis.

"Hn" was the only reply the blond got from the angry boy.

"You're the biggest dumbass on the planet Uchiha" Naruto said while sticking his arms behind his head and leaning back in the chair "You're luck Sakura saved you"

"I didn't asked to be saved"

"And you're damn lucky she didn't die"

"It would have been no ones fault but her own"

"That's bullshit and you know it" The angry blond stood yelling over the impassive Uchiha "She almost drown, and then she almost died of hypothermia. If you hadn't come back she wouldn't have to save you. If you never left she'd never have been anorexic!"

"Stop" both males look over to Sakura who laid in bed, eyes closed. She was so tired, sosososotired , she could barely think through the fog in her mind "Stop it both of you"

"But Sakura-chan.." Naruto started to protest

"There's nothing we can do about that past. We can only focus on the now"

"Well presently I want to kick the Ice Princess's butt" The blond said falling back into his chair in a huff. He then shot a look at the bed-ridden boy "What about you? Do you even feel enough to want?" Naruto asked sneering at Sasuke, all the malice and hurt that had built up aimed at him in one glare.

"Fuck you"

"It speaks!"

"Screw you Uzumaki" Sasuke hissed like a cornered animal; claws drawn, teeth bared.

"What am I going to do with you two" Sakura sighed, trying to push herself into a sitting position. Naruto hurried over to help her, bumping Sasuke on purpose on the way over. "You" she points to Naruto "Sasuke-kun just tried to kill himself. Chill out for just a few minutes okay? And you!" She glared pathetically at the raven pointing somewhere too far to the left "You have some talking to do once I don't see three of you at once"

-o-

_I woke up to the real life  
and I realized It's not worth running from anymore  
when there was nowhere left to hide I found out  
that nothings real here but I won't stop now until I find a better part of me_

_that's out there somewhere  
and It cant be that far away  
that's where I'll find myself  
and I'll find my way out  
that's where I'll find out_

_-o-  
_

Four days. It felt like four years to the Uchiha boy. With the rush of nurses in and out. Sakura's mother had come to visit. There had been a lot of crying from both the pink haired women. Naruto was a permanent fixture, much to Sasukes massive displeasure and odd enjoyment, who took it upon himself to glare at him at all times. They inevitable argued when Sakura was asleep. Which was most of the time. Just like old times.

Dinner that night consisted of sandwiches. Just like every meal besides breakfast. Sakura had managed to get a few bites of it down, but most of her strength she had been acquiring was due to her IV drip. They, Sakura and Sasuke, were both considered physically stable. Mental, well. It's hard to hide from nurses that your ribs and hips stick out or the rows of slices that litter your arm. The future was uncertain.

Some things had shifted in the few days the three had spent quarantined together. Sasuke had been spending less and less time in his own bed. Every time he shut my eyes all that could be felt was drowning. Being sucked away into the vivid nothing. Every breath felt like his lungs were being filled with dark murky water. The raven sat on the right of Sakura, Naruto on her left,. The heat felt amazing to Sakura. Like popcorn cornels of purple popping happily in her chest. It wasn't just the warmth. It was what it implied. That she had both her boys. Alive. Breathing. Caring. Keeping her warm. Keeping each other sane. Naruto, well. He couldn't leave them. He didn't know what would happen to his friends. Yes, they were together. But they had been brought together by a suicide. By mental illness. By a habit of self harm. They simply couldn't just be released back into the world. Doctors aren't that stupid. He wouldn't, he couldn't be separated. The constant worry about the two would drive him batshit crazy. He promised to follow them, not only for his sanity, but for his important people's mental stability.

Few words had been uttered past the initial interrogation of Sasuke. Most comfort was given by the physical presence of the other two. All three sleeping on the two beds pushed together. Naruto was stoic, Sasuke stayed, Sakura was not a pathetic sobbing ball. So different then old times.

-o-

"Hey Sasuke" Naruto mused staring at the ceiling "What happens from here?"

"I'm as in the dark as you are" the raven sighed ruffling his hair in agitation

"Promise me something?"

"Hn"

"Don't leave me behind"

"Moron" Sasuke threw an apple at that blond "Don't say stupid stuff"

"Love you too bastard"

-o-

The rain had passed. Although the sky still hung with clouds hugging the nearby mountain tops shafts of delicate sunshine poked holes in the gloom.

Sasuke scowled as they hit yet another bump in the road, his head hitting the roof of the car. Stupid car, stupid road, stupid hospital.

Naruto snored, asleep despite the rough terrain of their hour long travel, on Sasukes shoulder. He was drooling slightly. Che, moron.

"Only Naruto could sleep at a time like this" Sakura commented, staring out the rolled down window. The fast cool air hit her face giving it the color he hadn't seen there in months. Her leg was going at lightening speed as she jiggled it. Sasuke reached a hand across Naruto to stop Sakua's leg. She turned to look. Jade eyes held confusion, worry, and many other emotions that any normal person would feel in this situation. It was a sad day when Sakura was the normal one.

Heh, sad day. It wasn't sad exactly. Their future was up in their air. For better or worse, things were changing. No lying, it would be pretty damn hard for things to get worse in this situation. So maybe it was a happy day…

"Naruto, wake up. We're here" Ikura said from the drivers seat then proceeded to turn off the engine and steep out of the car.

"Whaaaa, huhhh?" A groggy Naruto mumbled as he came into the waking world.

"We're here" All three slipped out to join Ikura in front of a complex of buildings. As they unloaded their luggage a woman came out to greet them. She introduced herself as the social worker and that she was very important during their stay.

_I'm like a crayon. I'm not your favorite color, but you're going to need me to complete your picture._

She escorted us to a building and into an elevator and Ikura left. Taking out a key card she punched the 3 button. They all rose to their future being reborn into this new world. Sakura hugged her duffle bag to her chest. Sasuke and Naruto leaned against the wall, shoulders brushing. In the hallway on the 3rd floor there are two signs. One reads 'High AWHOAL risk, please secure doors' the other 'Welcome to The Hidden Leaf Adolescent Psychiatric Ward" in vivid purple.

_I've heard this life is overrated  
But I hope that it gets better as we go_

A/N: It's finished! -tears up- My babies all grown up!

Ehm, anywho. Thanks for sticking with me and suppling me with love and reviews. I dunno what to do next for ff. Any suggestions? maybe parings? I need some inspiration!

If you'd like to look at some of my other writing I do original stuff and poetry on Mibba (_Shamless self-advertisment_) check mah profile

It's been wonderfull ya'll; Kaythxbai


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